stolen heart...

Aerosmith's~What it takes (changed to fit me)


There goes my old BOYFRIEND,
there's another diamond ring
And, uh, all those late night promises I guess they don't mean a thing
So baby, what's the story? Did you find another GIRL?
Is it easy to sleep in the bed that we made?
When you don't look back I guess the feelings start to fade away.
I used to feel your fire But now it's cold inside And you're back on the street like you didn't miss a beat, yeah

Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night Without thinking you lost everything that was good in your life to the toss of the dice?
Tell me what it takes to let you go.

Yeah BOY, before I met you I was F.I.N.E.
Fine but your love made me a prisoner, yeah my heart's been doing time
You spent me up like money, then you hung me out to dry
It was easy to keep all your lies in disguise
Cause you had me in deep with the devil in your eyes



Tell me that you're happy that you're on your own Yeah, yeah, yeah
Tell me that it's better when you're all alone
Tell me that your body doesn't miss my touch
Tell me that my lovin' didn't mean that much
Tell me you ain't dyin' when you're cryin' for me


Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night Without thinking you lost everything that was good in your life to the toss of the dice?
Tell me who's to blame for thinkin' twice No no no no '
cause I don't wanna burn in paradise Ooo Let go, let go, let go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go I don't wanna burn, I don't wanna burn

open up and let me in...

contents of bag = contents of life
1. black Kenneth Cole wallet containing; check book, debit card, and a single dollar, and a bazillion other cards I never use (ie health card, Blockbuster card, Fry's VIP card, etc)
2. Marlboro lights and lighter
3. Tape measure
4. cinnamon Trident gum
5. Camera
6. keys (office and apartment)
7. three different kinds of chapstick
8. four lipglosses
9. tide stain remover pen
10. recepits for god knows what
11. Vaseline Smoothing Moisture Cocoa Butter hand lotion
12. hair ties
13. a movie ticket stub
14. two business cards from random guys
15. Clean and Clear Oil Absorbing Sheets
16. MAC compact.

dang it...

I can't sleep.
I went to bed, watched some sex in the city,
and then rolled over in hopes of passing out.
Suddenly, for absolutely no good reason, ex-boyfriends started bombarding my mind; their faces, smiles, kisses, our talks, our laughter, our conversations, the "I love you's", the "I miss you's"...
Suddenly it hit me, - I'm not ready. I'm not ready for "the" serious relationship-
not ready for the end-all, be-all of relationships.
I'm 25, I'm young, I'm cute, I'm smart, and still have so much to see... why am I stressing about finding the perfect guy?

wordsofwisdom...

I have these shoes. Shoes that I wear all the time. Shoes that I am known to strut in, from time to time. And today, as I was strut--*ahem* walking down the street, a lady leaned out of her car and yelled, "I love your shoes!" (Those four little words totally made my day!)


Now it's a known fact amongst my friends that I have a bit of a shoe collection.
Every time I pass a shoe store I have a deep-seated belief that I have an obligation to go into that store-no matter what my checkbook says!
I don't know what comes over me
.I. Can't. Help. Myself.

:O)

Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they need to run free until they find someone just as wild to run with
~Carrie Bradshaw

#########

Your words to me just a whisper
Your face is so unclear
I try to pay attention
Your words just disappear

'Cause its always raining in my head
Forget all the things
I should have said

So I speak to you in riddles because
My words get in my way.
I smoke thewhole thing to my head and feel itwash away
'cause i can't take anymoreof this,
I want to come apart.
or dig myself a little hole insideyour precious heart'

Cause its always raining in my head
Forget all the things I should have said
I am nothing more than a little boy inside
That cries out for attention
though I always try to hide
'Cause I talk to you like children,
Though I don't know how I feel
But I know I'll do the right thing
If the right thing is revealed

'Cause its always raining in my head
Forget all the things I should have said

~Staind

I w o n t b e t h a t g i r l.

Dont feed me your stupid lines that you think I want to hear, only to five minutes later feed them to some other chick...
I dont believe them anymore.

Dont make promises you know you cant keep...
I dont trust you anymore.

Dont pretend to care when you dont...
I wont share with you anymore.

Dont complain to me that you're feeling neglected...
because frankly I'm not going to be there for you anymore.


I wont be that girl.
I wont be taken advantage of.
I wont be a friend of convenience.
I wont be at your beck and call.
I am not here at your disposal.


Im getting really sick, actually rather fed up with these guys who can enter someones life and so easily toy with their emotions.
Whatever happenned to being GENUINE?
Creating special bonds with the different individuals you meet rather than saying a whole lot of the same nothingness to appease them.
No girl likes to be made a fool of.
What purpose does it serve you?
Does it make you happy to know you're stringing along all these girls without remorse?

Every guy I meet has such a knack for
making me feel special,
feel thought of, feel like IM THE ONLY ONE,
only to disappoint me in the end
by throwing it all away like I meant absolutely nothing.
I deserve more than that.
I wont be a puppet in your games.
Im smarter than you.
Im one step ahead.
I will feed you your lines right back and with more conviction.
So dont think your tactics will work on me.
I can see right through them- right through you.

It's like sometimes when you get caught up with your own impression of the world
and the people around you,
it's time to just take a step back for a second
to actually observe reality
and understand whats really going on
and realize how you're really being treated.

This is my G O O D B Y E...